Posts

“Tell me why” | You’re in my head.

Tell me why it’s easy to forget them yet so hard to forget you. (Trust me I’ve tried to) Tell me why even after all of them had come and gone, you’re the only one I wished stayed along. Tell me why I haven’t been able to feel a single thing since being with you. I remember back then when nothing else really mattered whenever I was with you – How you’d always manage to sort of make the whole world stop and start again whenever I saw you; (swear I would’ve died for you). Tell me why I always get a rush whenever I remember your touch. The warm hugs and subtle pecks (the look on your face when I choked your neck ) I also remember how the love just overcame the lust, or how we always felt like it was the entire world up against US. – Oh, and yes. I did tell the stars all about us… :) Tell me why sometimes I feel like I need you. Why I feel like, after you, I’d never experience anything quite like you. Tell me why I loved you even though we (you) treated each other (me) li

Gémeaux

Si: Si is irretrievably intoxicated on the idea of romance and the many tales it can tell. Egotistical by nature, but nothing overwhelming. Not so overtly confident, but confident, nonetheless. Si tends to be more direct and upfront about matters concerning the opposite sex. He doesn’t really care where its going, or what’s next, he just enjoys living in the moment and creating memories he can always ponder over when he’s alone. You see, it’s the solitude that helps ease his mind. That is unfortunately where he feels he is safe. When the silence is loud and he's all alone with his thoughts to process over because I guess he just prefers it that way. It’s the way he’s been doing it his whole life, it’s probably the only way he knows how to do it. Si is a fiend for the rush of fresh romance similar to the ones in the movies that begin at the dawn of spring or the middle of summer. Where the euphoria never ends and the sunsets last a little longer, so we have more time to spen

Santé Mentale

Can’t really speak for everyone else so, I guess I’ll just speak about myself. We all know this life shit isn’t easy and no one just hands you a manual to get through it all. It’s all you, and that can prove to be overwhelming sometimes. Depending on your religious beliefs, one could argue that the bible or Quran for instance, is in fact that manual however, as we all know if life were really that easy we’d all go to heaven right? One thing about me is that I tend to feel things a lot deeper than the average male might like to admit in a variety of aspects. Meaning, the things we men find “easy” to shrug off or because of today’s social norms surrounded by how a man is supposed to act all the time we are not “allowed” to feel things such like emotional neglect or emotional manipulation and entrapment because, apparently it makes us less of a man. These are the things that take a bigger toll on me and usually take me longer to really get over, especially from a woman or loved one and al

Saint-Valentin

Saint Valentine, a third century Roman saint widely celebrated on February 14th, and commonly associated with "courtly love". Love. Is there really another word so complex, yet relatable, so misunderstood, yet perceivable. A word so beautiful, yet unforgivable. You ever wonder why love is an ever present topic. How we use it everywhere whether it be on television, or in novels, or in music, to this day there have been millions of references associated with love in all forms. Love makes the world go round, and without it we are lost. You brag about your materialistic attributes, and your long line of wealth yet long for compassion. Our generation is lost in the aesthetic of being with someone under false pretenses. We still think its "cool" to throw a word so sacrosanct out in the world freely with no remorse. We often dream of sharing our lives with someone, but aren't willing to endure the struggles, and pain that come with it. Society is blinded by the dep

Sunday.

This is the final day of the week for most of us, a day that brings the weekend to a slow death. A day so highly regarded it is in fact deemed the day of rest by Roman emperor Constantine the first who decreed this in 321 AD. A day so adored with religion you would think nothing wrong can go your way on this day, “The lord’s day” they call it in Greece. Sunday’s for me are probably my worst days if I’m being honest, and don’t get me wrong, there’s a lot of good that comes out of days like these. Be it family, or worship, or whatever it is you enjoy doing on your Sundays that make you happy, Sundays are usually associated with spiritual peace and a general serenity, and it is because of this I find it strange how it could mean the complete opposite to me. To me Sunday is a day of great discomfort, a day where I tend to sum up the whole week and question myself over certain things that took place in it. Only it never stops there, it goes further, deeper. This is a day where I o

The Present. - Excuse my slight tantrum towards the end.

Uni is a drag, and once again I have had the worst luck with the opposite sex. Seems like we’re back to square one, and for some reason I feel lower than I ever have this time. I feel dead inside, and it’s eating away every ounce of bliss and excitement the world has to offer. I’ve been drinking way more than I should of late, and I know I shouldn’t, but at this point anything to help ease the pain will do. A dysfunctional teen with dysfunctional thoughts around dysfunctional people, a recipe for everlasting melancholic feelings. A recipe made for the dark souls, for the broken. You know, the funniest thing about this whole thing is that I didn’t even ask for it this time. I was minding my own business before she said the things that would inevitably haunt me for years to come, and then longer. She did to me what I absolutely detest doing to others, she did the one thing she promised not to do and had the audacity to question my judgement and actually carry on further to say “I hope

Interlude - A taste of my family background.

You know sometimes I amaze myself. My entire exterior contradicts nearly everything my interior represents and most would probably never understand me or the type of person I am, and I’m completely okay with that because I struggle to answer that question myself, but one thing I do know for sure is that where there is love, there is a greater pain; and I am profoundly habituated to both. My family as a whole contributed to the madness that spirals round my head. To elaborate further I’ll start with my immediate family. My mother and father, both very different human beings, one could actually argue that they are in fact the complete opposite. But as the saying goes it turns out that opposites really do attract, but what was not mentioned is how they do not attract for so long and I guess that their separation was inevitable now that you think about it. I live in a home where false hope is encouraged and kept promises are a myth, where a series of bad decisions made by people who